World Domination and Godhood: How and/or why?

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World Domination and Godhood: How and/or why?

Postby Martenzo » Sun Jan 31, 2010 1:25 am

Some interesting points were raised in the Sims thread about world domination.

King of Zeroes wrote:See, now I would do something productive after my conquest. Like legalize polygamy and threaten hundreds of nubile young women into my harem. Then I'd have the Jonas Brothers and the members of Brokencyde executed on a 500 inch laser television while I engage in a hundredsome.

Just to clarify, that's a television made of lasers. And they would be catapulted at the television.

Might as well throw Hanson to the lasers too. I know they haven't actually produced any more of their earsplitting music, but I believed it was because they were dead. I do not like being wrong.

Personally, I I'm not going to push for godhood. World domination is good enough. Keeping control can be tricky at times. I opt for a "temporary" autocracy at first. While I'm an autocrat, I will get all my resources into figuring out a way to influence peoples' minds enough for them to elect me. Set up a democratic constitution that allows indefinite election terms when that's done. Then I peacefully resign as a dictator but get the influence device going a few weeks before. Boom, people will elect me to be their leader and they will think it's their own choice.

As for why... Because people need a strong leader to keep them out of trouble. Humans as a group are too dumb to make decisions that are good for them. They will always make decisions that are good for them in the short term, but as soon as there are short-term problems, they refuse to choose the option that's ten times better in the long run. So, I go ahead and take those choices away from them to make the world a better place. Oh, and I would also get interstellar travel research going on. To solve the problem of overpopulation without using genocide.
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Re: World Domination and Godhood: How and/or why?

Postby Silkspinner » Sun Jan 31, 2010 1:57 am

I will be the borg queen. All of those silly problems are thus resolved.

That is all.
O divine art of subtlety and secrecy! Through you we learn to be invisible, through you inaudible and hence we can hold the enemy's fate in our hands.
~ Sun Tzu
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Re: World Domination and Godhood: How and/or why?

Postby King of Zeroes » Sun Jan 31, 2010 2:03 am

Oh fine. Sure. Derail my topic derailment. All the people on that train? They died. Nice work. Murderer.

Me, I'd just be a pyschopath with way too much power. Eventually they'd all just depose me. Unless my plan of excellent benefits for minions and no-expense-too-great military equipment actually works and builds me an army of loyal followers willing to take a bullet for me because their full body armor is highly resistant to bullets.

Too many villains these days just see the lackeys as expendable. And they're not. They're the loveable glue that holds any evil organization together.

Every time a nameless lackey dies on screen, I can't help but think "the hero is a dick". Those guys had families! Evil Schmuck #2 was the single father of two daughters and survived paycheck to paycheck. Now he's dead.

Good job ruining lives.

Heroes suck.
"But between the rocks I caught a glimpse of something beautiful, with a cleavage that could hold up a fucking Christmas tree."
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Re: World Domination and Godhood: How and/or why?

Postby Devilmark » Wed Feb 17, 2010 6:59 pm

World domination...a simple endeavor. Even Genghis Kahn conquered half of the known world in his life time. The first step in conquering the world is the most interesting.

First you need money. Money pays the majority of henchmen, and anyone that works for the right price can be bought off, regardless. It also funds your technology bureau...all your weapons, armor, cybernetics, etc. will come from your technology bureau. The more money you have to invest, the more likely they will get you what you need.

Second, always look for the proper supporters of your cause. Not just people you pay, but people who've been hurt and betrayed enough in life to be sick of it, and want the world to change, for better or worse. These people are expendable, and useful because you can almost guarantee they're going to betray you because they still have a "glimmer of hope", and the hero will convince them to fight against you. This gives you the advantage of forcing them to act before they're actually ready to.

Third, always have advisors...even though they tend to be annoying. But ensure that one of your advisors is a child of roughly 5-8 years of age. Any plan your finest minds concoct, run it by the child. If the child finds a single hole in the plan, scrap it, and get a new one.

Fourth, never install a "self-destruct" button in your base of operations, unless there is a special sequence that only YOU know attached to it.

Fifth, never install a secret escape route that anyone knows about. If you have one installed, kill the people that built it, and destroy any and all blueprints they made. The same goes for your base of operations in general...kill anyone that built it, and destroy all blueprints. You don't need the blueprints to figure out if that skylight up above is in a bad place.

Sixth, when building your army, ensure you have several ranks of "trust" to apply. First level; untrusted, these ones are usually the fidgety ones that seem to have a problem with the killing of innocents. They are expendable. Second level; moderately trusted, these are the ones that do what you say, but tend to be unruly, and have poor judgement. Pay them enough and they'll stay loyal, kill them if they start to stray. Third level; highly trusted, these are the ones that will do anything for your cause, though they may still betray, always keep an eye on the ones that are TOO enthusiastic. Fourth level: completely trusted, this is a posthumous reward. If they die in the service of your cause, they were clearly completely loyal to you.

Seventh, always punish the right dumb-ass. When someone fucks up, don't kill someone else as punishment, kill THEM.

Eighth, do not stand for the questioning of your judgement. If you order a two hundred man squad to put down one man, it is with good reason. If your advisor asks you "What can one man do?" say, "This." and kill him.

Ninth, IF by chance the hero saves your life, that entitles them to one life in return. No more.

Tenth, don't monologue. Kill them, make sure there are no others sneaking about attempting to kill you...THEN monologue. Nobody needs to hear what your plans are anyway, especially if you don't intend to let them live as it is.

Eleventh, if you have children, the one who is most willing to kill their own sibling for power, is also the most likely to betray you, and kill you for the same.

Twelfth, if you have a powerful daughter who seems to think the hero is "cute", she's likely to end up being bedded by the hero, and betraying you. Kill her while you can.

Thirteenth, if you have grand children, keep them near when the hero breaks into your fortress. No right-minded hero is going to murder a man with his grand child. Take that opportunity to murder him.

Fourteenth, don't build an easy access sewer main into the castle's dungeon. Instead build the sewer main so that it leads to that big pack of demon crocs you keep for fun.

Fifteenth, if you have a moat, don't drain it. Instead, design the moat so that the other side is too slick to climb up, and keep some VERY nasty things in the moat.

Sixteenth, ensure your army is lead by strong military types that will recognize faces easily, and ensure that none of the military suits come equipped with face covering masks. Instead, have a sturdy translucent substance used as the mask, so no one's face can be hidden. If anyone IS hiding their face, they're probably the good guys, and should be put to death immediately.

Seventeenth, honor means little when conquering the world. Don't refuse assistance when killing the hero, and don't be afraid to feign an injury to get him to drop his guard. And once he does and you wound him...again, DO NOT monologue. Just lop his head off as quickly as you can.

Eighteenth, never pit a father against his own son. The outcome will ALWAYS be you getting betrayed.

Nineteenth, if two people enter your domain who fight with each other a lot, and seem to have a lot of sexual tension...have them both killed.

Twentieth, if you kill a young boy's family, and he swears revenge on you, don't let him live to attempt it. Kill him.

Very simple rules for would-be world dominators.
We, who not deny the animal of our nature. We, who yearn to preserve our liberation. We, who face darkness in our hearts with a solemn fire. We, who aspire to the truth and pursue it's strength. - Dimmu Borgir 'Progenies of the Great Apocalypse'
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Re: World Domination and Godhood: How and/or why?

Postby Martenzo » Wed Feb 17, 2010 11:26 pm

I believe a lot of the people here have seen this place already:

Though personally, I prefer to follow the benevolent overlord one. Though I can't find an online copy of it right now. The reason? I will actually be able to hold the moral high ground against most would-be heroes and possibly turn them or at least make them willingly abandon their quests to destroy me. Instead of going for the more secure route of just being feared, I try to use the iffier, but ultimately more rewarding, way of being both loved and feared.
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Re: World Domination and Godhood: How and/or why?

Postby Zalaku » Tue Mar 09, 2010 11:09 am

oh hai thar... I see your talking about meh

"I'm sorry I can't hear you, I'm nice and warm in my protective blanket of fear."
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Re: World Domination and Godhood: How and/or why?

Postby King of Zeroes » Tue Mar 09, 2010 2:59 pm

No. Not at all.

Don't you have simming lessons to get to?
"But between the rocks I caught a glimpse of something beautiful, with a cleavage that could hold up a fucking Christmas tree."
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